"Hi Mom, it's me."

"Hi Sally, are you okay? Aren't you with your father at the Ace Hardware?"

"Yeah, I was, but I got arrested and they've let me make one phone call."

"What happened?"

"Oh, I punched this African-American woman in the face."

"What on earth... Why did you do that???"

"Well, it really wasn't my fault.

Dad told me to find a "Black and Decker. Mom I knocked the $H!T out of her.