Sean went down to the local pub. Shamus behind the bar said "my God, man, what the hell happend to ya? yer bleeding and bruised all over boy!"

Sean said, "yes, I got the worst of it"

Shamus asked "Well, who gave you this thrashing?"

Sean said " Jamie McMurray"

Shamus said " that little runt did THAT to you, a big strapping lad? Did he have something in his hands?"

Sean replied, "He did at that, a shovel, and right handy with it, he was".

Shamus asked " Then why didn't you take something in your hands and fight back?"

Sean said "I DID have something in my hands...Mrs. McMurray's breasts. And, things of beauty that they are, they are useless in a fight"